oh you wanted chocolate atop your boston cream donut? too bad. that chocolate is for the paper bag you stupud bitch

Poison Ivy Uncovered #1 (2023) cover by Dan Mora

I fully understand that most sex-related studies are for obvious reasons probably not using a double blind protocol, but I have to confess that every time I see a journal headline about, say, the health benefits of oral sex or whatnot, the first question that pops into my mind is "how do you administer a placebo blowjob?"

how do conservatives think talking to children works? if a four year old came up to me and said “i’m a cat!!” i would say “really? what makes you a cat?” and they’d say some shit like “i have claws >:)” and i’d be like “oh wow, you do have claws. but wait, i thought cats had pointed ears!” and they’d say “they DO!!!” and then i’d pull up a picture of an elf and ask “is THIS a cat?” and they’d yell “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO”

u wouldn’t say “fucking hell, Emily, get it together. this is the real world”